Injury

by The Bedroom Witch

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about

Bedroom Witch, the self-described “misunderstood maker of the veil,” is the bedroom goth pop project by Sepehr Mashiahof, a trans-Iranian artist based in Los Angeles. Injury, her third album, is a metaphor for trauma that is sustained and irremovable. “The lyrics invoke visions of safe spaces for the trans/queer body and present forms,” Mashiahof writes, “through worlds that are pleasantly lonely and apocalyptic to cope with your current reality.”

credits

released April 21, 2017

Written and recorded by Sepehr Mashiahof 2015-2016 in Los Angeles. Mixed and mastered by Sharmi Basu in Oakland, CA. Additional vocals on “Unfamiliar” by Hana Weiss, Jenna Marx, and Ducky Bace. Additional production on “Irremediable”, “Sister”, and “Witness” by Sepand Mashiahof.

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Track Name: Apocalypse
Apocalypse
My empty nest

Do you not see what silent dangers do to us all?
Oh you could take in everything
With a grain of salt and move on
And I always said I would commit
But I know someway I got to live
Through all of this, my empty nest

It’s never wrong to say you’re uncomfortable with yourself
Oh you could be the only thing
That can save me from my shell
It’s so easy for me to dream of dreary paths
That ever last

Enough is enough

Come curl up in my empty nest
(My empty nest, my empty nest)
This is my apocalypse
(apocalypse, apocalypse)
But you just think I haven’t slept enough
Enough is enough

And I always said I would commit
But I know someday I’ll bury this
In bitterness, my empty nest

My home is in my empty nest
Comfort’s my apocalypse
But you just think I haven’t slept enough
Enough is enough
Track Name: Touch
Pain, desire, it’s stalling me
I desperately await the signs that follow me
With empathy I cry

Touch me, I want to be out of touch
Baby don’t touch me, I want to be out of touch with myself

My instincts telling me that you’ve been falling
You’ve been slipping away
I’d rather stand alone than to keep running
I’m not running away
Don’t ever say I’ve been faking
Survival desensitizes you

Don’t come close cause I’m scared of today
And I wish I could do it over
So, so many people to face
It’s hard to be when you are seen

So touch me, I want to be out of touch
Baby don’t touch me, I want to be out of touch with myself
Don’t touch me

I glisten, ocean blue, and watch my memories
Wash my memories away
My truths are told in twos and you’ve been playing
You’ve been playing the game
Don’t ever say I’ve been faking
Survival desensitizes you

Don’t come close cause I’m scared of today
And I wish I could do it over
(Living off of my numbing ways)
So, so many people to face
It’s hard to be when you are seen

Touch me, I want to be out of touch
Baby don’t touch me
Track Name: Evil
‘Evil’ is just a trope
Islands so monochrome
The weight upon this hell
Turns to ruins of the self

Rooms fade to love decay
I will live forever in your head

‘Evil’ is just a trope
Islands so monochrome
The weight upon this hell
Turns to ruins of the self

Doom fades to lovely shades
And I will live to die there
You're holding on to everyone
They still believe you're gone
I'm holding on to every rock
I'm holding on to none

We can play any role
Match made for every soul
The weight upon this hell
turns to ruins of the self

‘Evil’ is just a trope
Islands so monochrome
The weight upon this hell
Turns to ruins of the self

I will live forever
You're holding on to everyone
They still believe you're gone
I'm holding on to every rock

‘Evil’ is just a trope
Islands so monochrome
The weight upon this hell
Turns to ruins of the self
Track Name: Unfamiliar
How do we get out of this; the pretense a hex
I saw the looming terror make you stranger
Inside my head
How will you get out of my bed, won’t be your girl
I take a step into unfamiliar worlds

I knew why but I was shy
And time will pass a warning
I knew why but I was shy
And my owls will be watching
When you look unfamiliar to me

I’m so sick of myself
(Try to relate but I’m not feeling like me)
I’m so sick of myself
Don’t try to relate to me

How do we get out of this; the pretense a hex
I saw the looming terror make you stranger
Inside my head
How will you get out of my bed, won’t be your girl
I take a step into unfamiliar worlds

I know who I’ve lost me to
And time will be the enemy
I know who I’ve lost me to
And my owls will still be watching

I’m so sick of myself

I’m spending time alone with my back turned
To a face I once loved
I can’t believe I’m staring back
At a face that I thought I trusted at all

How do we get out of this; the pretense a hex
I take a step into unfamiliar worlds

I’m so sick of myself
Don’t try to relate to me

I’m spending time alone with my back turned
To a face I once loved
I can’t believe I’m staring back
At a face that I thought I trusted at all

How do we get out of this; the pretense a hex
I saw the looming terror make you stranger
Inside my head
How will you get out of my bed, won’t be your girl
I take a step into unfamiliar worlds
Track Name: Irremediable
Humans are so lonely
Existing is dull
You don't really know me or love me at all
Humans are so worried
So worried they are

You learned I am invincible to all that blush

And we are disposable to another day
(come back to us)
So I have to find the energy to be the blame for all
(Irremediable)

In satan's anatomy I would be the calf
we are satan's anatomy
(come back to us)

Humans isolating, a body for one
This will sink in slowly, the seeds we have dropped
Humans can't deceive me as long as they're lost

You learned I am invincible to all that blush

And we are disposable to another day
(come back to us)
So I have to find the energy to be the blame for all
(Irremediable)

In Satan's anatomy
Track Name: Closure
When I was at my lowest I could see myself go deeper
Pain’s the only promise that our feelings have to offer
In a dream, your face was glowing like a morning in the summer sun
Your eyes turned into windows for me to jump out from

Life in the open void takes you in forever
Dying for the closure that we could never gather
(I’m afraid of getting older)
We felt in confidence that this is never over
We were so confident time will bring no closure

I am still in love with every seashore in the winter
I will learn to slow down and turn to the observer
And say that dreams are nothing more than mirages of another life
I’ve been there before and I’ll return when the timing’s right
Life in the open void takes you in forever
Dying for the closure that we could never gather
(I’m afraid of getting older)
We felt in confidence that this is never over
We were so confident time will bring no closure

Your eyes turned into windows for me to jump out from

When I was at my lowest I could see myself go deeper
(I’m afraid of getting older)
When I was at my lowest I saw you fade into glimmers
Track Name: Disillusioned
I’m going home with you tonight
I’m going to fall out of love tonight
Lose concentration, I feel so disillusioned
True to delusions, I just can’t get use to it

I don’t want you to feel useless

But I know that you’re not what I need
I’ll just have to live with you hating me
I’ll just have to live with you not holding me

I’m falling out of love tonight
I’m going to cry myself to sleep tonight
Lose concentration, I feel so disillusioned
True to delusions, I just can’t get use to it

I don’t want you to feel useless

But I know that you’re not what I need
I’ll just have to live with you hating me
You’re not what I need
I’ll just have to live with you not holding me
Track Name: Pulse
Heart, it carries weight
When everybody is complicit with shame
The hunger to retain every memory that dissociates

To feel the rush, a pulse
It shows I’m alive
I feel your touch, the stars
They burn in my eyes
And I lose sight of the night
Each side of the face tells you I’m fine
But my veins are the path of soulless tides

The pulse is repulsive

Who are you to say
I’m relearning all my toxic ways
I am filled with all your hate
Cause I’ve always been afraid of the drains
And I’ve lost track of the days

To feel the rush, a pulse
It shows my demise
You shouldn’t trust the touch
It takes three to decide on your life

Each side of the face tells you a lie
My veins are the path of soulless tides

The pulse is repulsive

Heart, it carries weight
When everybody is complicit with shame
The hunger to retain every memory that dissociates

To feel the rush, a pulse
It shows my demise
You shouldn’t trust the touch
It takes three to decide on your life
Track Name: Sister
Call it like I see it as a display
A sense of hardening reflected on me
You don't have to look when I ache in the same way
And I have no will to go on

I had never realized, I can see through his light
Tell me all the reasons why, I can stay up all night
Tell me are your secrets mine?

She's so lost in every detail
How far will the patterns evolve?
He has a way with excuses and I have no will to go on

You have to learn how to love her
To love her

Tell me how to feel alright, I had never realized
I can see through this life, I can stay up all night
Tell me are your secrets mine, I can stay up all night
Learning where the secrets hide

She's so lost in every detail
How far will the patterns evolve?
He has a way with excuses and I have no will to go on

He wants you to let him inside
She walks you through it this time
She's my sister

She's so lost in every detail
The patterns evolve

You have to learn how to love her
Track Name: Exile
I’ve been cast adrift
Careless, idle limbs
My dimension lies somewhere in space and time
Exile
Track Name: Witness
She watches it happen, as time wears a cruel grin
It was the saddest thing she witnessed
The saddest thing she witnessed

Expressions of their agony
The agony has stiffened
(They take it all away from her)

She had to witness a certain strive for whiteness
It was the saddest thing she witnessed
The saddest thing she witnessed

(They take it all away from her)
Oh, The agony's stiffened
To know they're all she had left's got her feeling betrayal
(They take it all away from her)

She had to witness a certain strive for whiteness
It was the saddest thing she witnessed
The saddest thing she witnessed
Track Name: Play
I wanna go outside and play with him
I wanna lay my thighs next to his
I wanna feel my thighs next to his
I wanna go outside and play with him

I'll have the devil's eyes when we touch lips
(You will never be a friend)

And I get what I want but I can't pretend I like it
(You will learn to believe me)

I wanna go outside and play with him
I wanna lay my thighs next to his
(You will never be a friend)

And I get what I want but I can't pretend I like it
My feelings have surfaced and I can't pretend I'm like this
(You will learn to believe me)
No I can't pretend I like it

I'll have the devil's eyes when we touch lips
(You will never be a friend)

My feelings have surfaced and I can't pretend I'm like this

I wanna go outside and play with him
(You will never be a friend)
I wanna lay my thighs next to his
I'll have the devil's eyes when we touch lips